Thursday, May 04, 2006

One of those special moments:

You know, it really only happens once in life. You think it happens several times, but when it happens "for real", you definitely know it's happened. What I'm talking about, ladies and gentlemen, is love. That fateful word that can send chills running up and down your spine. It makes you question everything you've ever thought about in life.
It can make you question religion, lifestyle, music, movies, books, and everything else you ever thought to be true.
Now please allow me to share a personal story with you.
I went to the movies with Tiphane. I have always had an affinity for Uma Thurman. Any woman that can wield a sword, get bloody in the process and kill 88 people within 10 minutes is just fine by me. So naturally, I went to see "Terapia do Amor". I have no idea the English name, but it had her and Meryl Streep in it. Pretty decent film for it's genre, although I was disappointed that halfway through she didn't end up slicing someone in half with a Hanzo sword or overdosing on cocaine.
It was just your usual everyday romantic comedy. Pretty good though, if only because it had Uma Thurman in it.
The movie ended, and I was sort of disappointed, if only because I'd rather see Uma Thurman naked than Sharon Stone (whom I saw naked plenty in Basic Instinct 2.) But really though, that had nothing to do with it for everyone out there (one person) who is angry at me. It's because the ending was confusing as hell. I was like "so wait... did they get back together?" I couldn't tell. In Kill Bill, I knew she killed Bill. In Pulp Fiction, I knew she ODd and coke and lived.
We left the theatre and began walking home. We took the usual route, mostly because it's the fastest route. By now it was around 12:30AM. So we're walking, talking, just making our way back home, so whatever ya know.
But as I'm walking, all of a sudden I see something. Now folks, this was not a normal everyday creature that you see. The pure beauty and loveliness was unmatched by anyone. I was walking and suddenly, there she was. I knew that she had to be mine. In the words of Mariangélica, "[she] was so cute I just wanted to kick [her]".
But should I kick something that is of purity and cleanliness and, dare I say it, divinity? Were they truly sent from the heavens above? Would this be the thing I needed in life to make me believe in and aware of the power of God? (<-- Hah.)
I looked down, because being 6'2" most here in Brazil are shorter than me, and was in awe. I shuffled my feet, kind of nervous. She was going the same way as us. I kept kind of shuffling, kicking things on the ground as I maintained sight, never more than 10 or so feet in front of me. When we turned onto our street, I could not believe that she was still there, directly in front of me. Tiphane said "if she's still there when we get home, I'll give you 50 cents." Unfortunately it was only R$0,50 she meant instead of US$0.50, but nevertheless, that's enough for a cup of coffee at the school cantina.
When we arrived at home, there she was, still directly in front of me, even about to turn into and go up our steps, right towards our door. I could not believe it, and neither could Tiphane.
I began to think, "Is this what I've been waiting for my entire life? Is this what I've needed the entire time I've been in Brazil?" The answer to those questions was obviously yes. I knew that I had seen and met someone special, and I was not going to take this for granted.
I gently stroked her, rubbing her down her sides, trying to work down towards her butt but she would have none of that. We had just met! I knew that I would need proof of this, for all the guys back home. So when I got in the house, I knew that I would have to sit her on my stool in the room and take a picture of her, from several angles to show off her true beauty.
I even got a picture of me stroking my hands through her hair, then looking deep into her eyes, and then, as unexpected as it was, kissing her. Yes folks, I got to first base this quickly with the most beautiful piece of work ever laid down on this earth.
Enough of the story, because I'm sure you're tired of reading. But folks, I would like to introduce you to my new love, the one I have been waiting for my entire life, the one for me and probably so many others but because of the time I saw her and her strategic placement, she is mine. Ladies and gentlemen, please meet my new lover...
Vanessa. She is my rock, my awareness of the shortness of life and the quickness at which it can be taken away, yet she weathers on, fearing not death nor injury, she only shines on, passing the time away in her evident beauty until years and years from now, she withers away into nothingness, leaving behind only a grain of herself. As small and nearly invisible as this grain is, there is no doubt where she once was and the many things she saw and experienced during her time on earth. Again... Vanessa.

Here she is, sort of bent over, shying away from the camera. Obviously no one has ever photographed her in this position!

Now she's lightening up, showing off a little bit of that beautiful smile I know she has!

And there she is lying down, waiting for me to make her my lover.

Here I am staring deep into her eyes, letting her know my true intentions and how much I have grown to love her within only an exceptionally minute fraction of her life.

Here I am, gently stroking her hair, showing off to the camera that our love knows no bounds!

And here we are in our moment of passion. Much happened after this photograph was taken, but Tiphane didn't want to have any part of it and as such left the room. At least she turned the camera off first to spare the battery power, because Vanessa had other plans in mind for the juice left in those batteries ;-).

And now here I am, hoping you enjoyed that little story of mine. In reality what happened was I kicked this rock, then like most people, kicked in one more time, thinking it would go off somewhere too far and I'd give up and just keep walking. But no this rock would not leave. Everytime I kicked it, no matter how hard and no matter in what direction, it stayed in front of me, for probably two miles I kicked this rock. All down the street from close to the mall, by the government buildings, up two flights up steps, across intersections, through a small park, and all the way down the street until I finally got the last kick in up one small step through the gate that leads to our house. Tiphane told me when I first started kicking it that she'd give me 50 cents if I made it all the way home without losing it. As continued kicking it, the rock almost became like a child to me. I had to guide it, ensuring that it went down the right path and did not deviate into sin or perhaps the use of ecstasy or crystal meth (DMT or psylocibin would be okay though, so go on little rock, become enlightened).
So I made it home with the rock and decided that my dedication warranted pictures and even a small kiss. This rock will now travel with me everywhere, as it is currently in my bookbag and I will likely forget it's there for quite some time. But nonetheless, it will go with me to São Paulo, all around Curitiba, to Rio de Janeiro, to the Pantanal, possibly again to Florianópolis, and who knows where else. It will also become educated as I take it to class with me.
So there you have it folks. I hope you have enjoyed my tale of adventure and fun, and never deny the undying and unquestionable love that your pet rock can give to you. I know I won't.


Messiah said...

Hey, you scared me at first, and then I laughed a lot.
What a bizarre story.
good luck with your... rock...

the rock said...

I love you too, baby. Never forge about me. You will be in my heart forever.
I want to be with you for good.

I love you.

(yeah mate, guess who realy wrote this?)